Friday, June 28, 2013

Is Pushing People Away Normal Addict Behavior?

Simple Answer: Yes.

1. An addict tends to push away the people that are closest to them, to make space for the most important thing in their life; the substance or whatever addiction they are choosing.

2. Rock bottom is not an absolute; it varies from person to person. For some, losing their spouse is enough whilst for others living on the street is not enough.

3. People can change, however they can only be changed by themselves. They do all the work and, hopefully, ask guidance of a Higher Power greater than themselves. An addict cannot change to please someone else. All that someone can do for an addict is to provide them with realistic options and alternatives to their current behaviors. Professional advice often involves minimizing the harm that the substance or current addiction (sex, gambling, codependency, eating or spending) is causing to the addicts body and mind.

4. Most addicts feel terribly guilty for their behavior towards others, especially their loved ones. Sometimes, this shame and guilt drives them further into the addiction. When an addict becomes clean, they often feel the need to make amends with people they feel they have mistreated.

I've done it.

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