Being Kind To Myself Through Trial and Error

This evening I had a wonderful conversation with one of my sponsees. This woman is beautiful, energetic, full of admirable strength and courageous inside of trial and error. She has taken a stand for who she wants to be and shows it through her actions. There is so much to be said for that!

Our conversation tonight was built around the idea that it is okay to change your mind. To be fully self-expressed and honest, and that there is no shame in that. I used to think differently on this.

In my past, many fears would rise up inside of me if I didn't do what others wanted me to. Fear of rejection. Fear of judgement. Fear of abandonment. So, I followed to belong, all the while silently suffering and even, at times, feeling like a victim. I would tell myself that nobody understood me. Well duh! I was following others, molding and shaping my truth to match theirs...totally dissolving to 'fit in'. 

Today, I know I will survive if someone leaves me behind due to a disagreement. I know I cannot change anyone's mind, only my own. I can reassure myself today with one simple question: Did I speak my truth? And if the answer is 'Yes', then I am being loving, patient and kind with myself through full self-expression. If it works and creates happiness in my life, I will continue to do it. If it doesn't, I learn and grow from that experience...and hopefully do not do it again.

Also, if I decide to change my mind, that's okay, too, as long as I'm not harming myself or others. There is just so much to learn from trial and error...its my decision whether or not to be kind to myself in the interim.